12.24.21

 My friend's bf hit her. 
And she's still. fucking. with. him. 

I'm so heated about it, and I don't even wanna talk about him until he's been put in the trash where he belongs. She brought up their intimacy and I'm just like "why are we fucking talk about him, he's fucking dead to me." 

I know I'm not going to be a fan favorite for pointing that shit out, but I'm not here to tell my friends what they WANT to hear. I'm here to speak the truth and push my friends towards decisions that are GOOD for them. 

Being with this shitcunt is NOT good for my friend. I'm so glad I spent close to a year alone after my break up with nick, 

It gave me time to get comfortable with myself, and re-develop my confidence, which was practically null by this point. Everything else about my life at that point was a mess, but I at least had that and what I was feeling went directly into my art. 

My other friend who knows isn't speaking up, because she took an abuser back too--but she's apparently leaving him, so I think she TOTALLY has room to talk. She's speaking from an experience; she should've left his ass the first time. 

If he learns to "be better" cool. He can go be better with someone he didn't betray yet. I don't want to find out my friend was fucking killed by a goddamn hobgoblin. 

I just wanted to shriek "stop giving him pussy. He's NOTHING." My girl has her flaws, but she's been through ENOUGH abuse. She doesn't need to be hit on top of it for literally doing nothing wrong. 

It crushed me watching her defend his shit; taking blame for something that wasn't her fault. 
His mom took his side too. And then the next tried to butter her up like she was "just looking out" for her. 

And in another corner, I have a DIFFERENT friend who's spouse ran away O_o 
Like, no one's seen them. And this friend has never been single for longer than a few months, and that is SO unhealthy. 

This friend was married once before; and that spouse became INTENSELY abusive towards them. 
They knew their current spouse for no more than a year before marrying them. 

And I just....couldn't fucking imagine rushing shit like that, just because I didn't want to be alone??? 
Now I got my grievances with myself, but I am very aware of what I *do* have to offer, and it's TOO good to give to just ANYONE. 

You fuck it up, then I will leave. I'm never going to beg someone to love me again; 
I'm a lot harder to keep this time around. 

Poor Taf.