10.11.22

I think I just haven't been tested like that in a minute. There could be a million factors to why that interaction felt so weird.

But at the end of the day; I was hurt because this persona I've created wasn't strong enough to protect me. I need to be more poised--controlled and most importantly, I need to believe in my own "bullshit."

I am not pretending to be a bad bitch that has it all; I AM a bad bitch that has it all.

And I should know better than to let anyone with a life I do not envy and opinions I think are brain dead, stupid and flawed to make me feel less than myself.

Not everything felt needs to be said and I really need to remember that. A bad bitch doesn't need to advertise, but I watched myself in real time explaining who I am--that cannot happen; we needn't explain. We don't need to explain our changes or our existence. We are allowed to simply "be."

Hopefully keeping wings up will be easier without the progesterone and the back pain.

I am hot.

I am smart.

I am kind.

I've done a lot of growing, and I like the person I've become and will continue to become.

I am nothing like I was 7 years ago, and I will continue to change. I will continue to grow and become more than I ever was.

>:[ and I'm gonna look forward to that shit, goddamn it.